Honor and Glory!

My readers rock. You know how I know this? 'Cause I've been nominated for a Book Blogger Appreciation Award in the best Special Interest Blog category. *sniff* I'm so chuffed. It's an honor to be nominated and be in such glorious company with Rex Parker's Pop Sensation and Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, among others.


But! I need your help. I need to submit five of my posts that best represent my blog. Any suggestions? A Baen book, perhaps? Definitely have to throw in a Mammary Monday and a Phallic Phriday submission. But which? I'm stumped. What do you think??


In other news, look to the left------>


There's a link for my etsy store. I add new stuff all the time. Buy something and I will offer you the opportunity to guest blog a book cover or two. You know you want to. You can also scroll down for my Paypal "donate" link if you aren't feeling in the need of something crafty. If you've already bought something or donated something and would like to take advantage of this opportunity, throw me a line over at judgeabook@yahoo.com.


And, since I can't leave you alone without a book cover to snark on...Here's a note from my former supervisor along with a cover. Is her head on fire???

I'm feeling better!

I have a whole host of books backing up for your enjoyment and will get to them presently. For right now, however, I'll leave you with these pictures from reader Snow, who is in Phallic Phriday withdrawal and is seeing "them" everywhere! The horror!

From Snow:

Miss Maughta, I miss Phallic Phriday, but I haven't been to a bookstore (or library) in ages. I did go to "America's Country Store" yesterday for birdseed and cat food, though. From the attached photos you'd have thought I went to Good Vibes.

By the way, these are ergonomically designed. Ah. That's what they call it these days.

Ooops!

Eeek, it's been a whole week. I swore I wouldn't do that to you again, and then look what happens! Bad Maughta! No biscuits for you. Erm...me. Damn, third person fucks me up again! This always happens late on Friday.

Okay, I'm waffling because, quite frankly, I don't actually have a book to post right now. Maybe tomorrow? I promise!!!

But I do have news! Everyone once in a while things happen in my life that have nothing to do with book covers (say it ain't so!). Mostly it's weird things happening at the reference desk. You ever want to see crazy people go to your downtown library on a full moon and watch the folks who come to the reference desk. Of course, you'll be one of the weirdos hanging out in the library on a full moon, too, so watch out! Anyway, I've decided to revive an old blog of mine, I Hate Asheville. Here you will find my various musings. Enjoy!

Since I've denied you a chance to laugh at bad book covers, here's my gift to you: The enormously funny "Blog" of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks. It's my new "favorite" blog! No, really, it is!

Also, since I've let the cat out of the bag that I'm here in the lovely town of Asheville (note to stalkers and secret admirers: I like chocolate), I figure it's a good time to invite all my closest readers to meet me and DocTurtle (if I can convince him) at Burgermeister on Haywood Road in West Asheville on Sunday, May 4th at 1:30pm for burgers, beers, and a big ole basket of onion rings. Drop me a line if you can make it!

And finally, on a more personal note, I've recently (after thirty some odd years) discovered my dream job. Did you know there's a thing called "Publisher's Reader?" I didn't! Apparently publishing people will pay someone to read their slush piles. Holy shit! Get paid to read? Sign me up! So if any of my publishing readers have some manuscripts just dyin' to be read, let me know. I prefer fantasy and mysteries and things I don't have to think to much to read (ugh, philosophy, yuck!), but I'll read anything that's fiction. Plus I work cheeeep!

Post #100!

Wow, post #100 came out of the blue, huh? I've got a special treat for you today which is, of course, not really book related.

It's funny how the internet works, isn't it? A couple of librarians sit around and make fun of James Patterson. One of them has the genius idea to write down the last like from all the chapters (which would be a herculean effort if the. chapters. weren't. written. like this.) and she posts the list on her blog. Another librarian in the system hears about it, finds it hilarious, and posts it on her own blog. Wham, bam, thank you librarian ma'am, and so it goes.

Ladies and gentlebeings, I have the great pleasure to present to you today the first nine chapters in the soon-to-be hit series, You've Been Warned the One Panel Comic Strip. Brought to you by http://www.aperfectworld.org/. And they said it couldn't be done...

I'm a Lazy Bitch

Okay, so after being amazingly negligent in posting recently and I apologize. I promise to try and be better soon. Please keep sending me covers and links, as it makes my job easier (and I'm a lazy bitch).

DocTurtle and I recently purchased a 2006 Honda Civic Hybrid, so I've been driving all over the mountains of NC in my new toy (and working extra hours to pay for it!). I won 1200 nickels on the slots at Cherokee, which sounds like a lot more than it is (my mom, maughtamom, can top me; she won 60,000 pennies once). But in the meantime, I've been neglecting you sorely, for which I apologize. Thanks for sticking with me.

So of course, after that apology, I'm still not posting (not really). Just wanted to let you know that I've been nominated (yay!) for Top 10 Blogs to read in 2008 by LISNews. Thanks to effinglibrarian and anonymous for nominating me. Cross your fingers, ya'll.

More covers to come soon, I promise!

Not a Phallic Phriday Post

Well, not even a book post, but interesting (to me) nonetheless. Because it's so freakin' funny, here are some of the search terms that people have been using to find my blog. I don't ever remember discussing Jesus dipped in urine OR little bunny naked. Oh, and some people are really into pecs.

Of course, that said, I'm glad no one can access my search histories!

librarian blog
book covers
the texas-israeli war book
judge a book by its cover
judging a book by its coverb
ook covers
you can't judge a book by looking at its cover
first paragraph of room 13
ya gay lit blog
you shouldn't judge a book by its cover
little bunny naked
greek themed romantic fiction
never judge a book by its cover cartoon
covers
never judge a book by its cover and other morals
huge pecs
what does dont judge the book by its cover mean?
naked hunk blogspot
stop snarking
good literary fiction
what is literary fiction
dont judge a book by its cover speech
wedding greek judge
prison pulp erotica
i can't help myself 2007
triple play
fortune's fool lackey
mammary monday
the biggest pecs
nancy drew pulp book cover
creepy baby names
judge baby names
do not judge a book by its cover quote
romance novels trash
ymatador of shame
bad book covers
cover - greek
books trailsman
jesus dipped in urine
rumble fish old cover
freakin-huge
my pecs are too big
saw book covers
how to judge a book by its cover
don't judge the book by its cover story
how much money is one book cover from cvs
judge a book by its cover blog
harlequin greece
how to cover books
phun
male pecs biggest
giant pecs
you cant judge a book by its cover

Al Scaduto Rocks the House

Not book related, but Maughta related, so deal.

For those of you who've gotten here by other means than Comics Curmudgeon*, you may have missed the glory that is They'll Do It Every Time (TDIET) by Al Scaduto. It's an old, ooooooold school comic strip (think the '50s) that is still alive and kicking, and still taking ideas from its readers. Just yesterday DocTurtle and I had our idea published.

This actually happens in our house. However, to save Mr. Scaduto's 1950s sensibilities, we switched the genders around. Yes, 'tis I who sits around in oblivion, usually reading or surfing the net, while poor DocTurtle labors away cleaning up after me and the dogs. Since he's also the primary breadwinner of the family, I make out like a bandit. No one can understand how I lucked out so much (not even my Jewish mother, who thinks the sun rises and sets on me, but recently told me she's proud of me, but really proud of Patrick. We love you, Mom!). Charm, humor, and the love potion from the gypsy down the stree....ulp...forget I said that! Let me just say that I love my DocTurtle with all that is in me, and he must be getting something out of the bargain 'cause he hasn't run screaming yet. And you can't have him. Neener neener.

Here's a shot of us from six years ago, the day before our wedding. See how tightly I've got a hold of him? No escape! (Please don't ask me about those pants. I was young.)

Wow, we do look like Mr. Scaduto's drawing, down to the color of my shirt. Creeeeeeepy.

So this has really turned into a paean to my Patrick, the coolest mathematician on the block. Sorry for the sidestep into Maughtaworld; more covers to come soon. Just thought I'd take a moment to show you how my fame spreads far and wide. Like my hips.

*The rockingest blog on the blogosphere and someplace you should definitely go.

The Most Rebarbative Envelope Pictures

Guten Tag to all my German speaking readers. I found this while perusing my stat counter:

Die Falsifizierung von Binsenweisheiten
Wer auch immer behauptet hat, man könne Bücher nicht nach dem Äußeren beurteilen, kannte offensichtlich Judge a book by its cover nicht: in diesem Blog veröffentlicht eine Bibliothekarin die garstig- sten Umschlagbilder, die ihr im Rahmen ihrer Arbeit unter die Augen kommen.

Now, it's been a while since I've had German (and then just barely enough to pass the reading competency exam for grad school), so I put this through a trusty translator program that I found online (it's amazing, these internets!). Here's the translation I got:

The Falsifizierung of Binsenweisheiten
Whoever has stated, one can judge books not by the appearance, Judge a book by its cover did not know obviously: in this Blog a librarian publishes the most rebarbative envelope pictures which you
come within the scope of her work under the eyes.

I'm so chuffed! I promise to continue publishing the most rebarbative envelope pictures I can find. Next time. I promise.

Auf Wiedersehen!

Metapost

So I have been working my butt off for the last fifteen minutes (at least!) for you all, sadly to no avail, trying to find a good picture of the following covers: Youth Violence (Current Controversies) by Michael D. Biskup and Charles P. Cozic (Paperback - Sep 1992) and The Harmony Arms (An Avon Flare Book) by Ronald Koertge (Paperback - Sep 1994). If any one of my intrepid readers can manage to track down a good picture of either of these titles, you'll have my undying gratitude (and surely that's worth at least the cost of a cup of coffee, right?).

But this gives me a good chance to stop for a moment and say to everyone who comes here, especially the 150 or so returning visitors that I get every day, thank you, thank you, thank you. I'm glad that you like this idea. I'm glad that you find me entertaining enough to take a few moments and read my mindless blather. I'm glad that you leave comments which are, for the most part, funnier than whatever I say. I'm glad when you send me suggestions of book covers to snark on. To those of you from Austria, Germany, UK, Canada, Norway, China, Japan, New Zealand, Australia, and all the other places I dream of one day going, welcome. To my Mom, who worries about my language, my best friend, who corrects my grammar (bad grammar makes me [sic]), and everyone whom I know and don't know, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. To the publishing industry folk, thank you, and please don't sue me (and surely you have money in your budgets to hire a freelance cover approver, right?!). Especially to all the other librarians; y'all rock, and I'm glad I left graduate school to pursue librarianshipnessity.

Anyway, I've dribbled on long enough. I promise to keep posting regularly as long as y'all continue coming regularly. Drop me a line, eh? Oh, and 'cause I know my dogs are the cutest ever, here're some more gratuitous dog pictures. Ciao for now!

Not book related...

...Just a quick post to thank Josh of Comics Curmudgeon for sending traffic my way. I've had 100 times as many hits in the last few hours as I had yesterday. I'm freaking out!

For those of you who didn't come here from Comics Curmudgeon, GO THERE! I've been reading it for about a year and a half now, and the only person funnier than the commentators (of which there are over 200 or so a day) is Josh himself. I never realized people felt as strongly about comic strips as I do. Now I'm frightened.

I promise to update more frequently. Thanks for coming, y'all, and thanks for the comments!

Flicker Sex

This has absolutely nothing to do with book covers, but it's kinda cool. I just watched two flickers do a mating dance on my front lawn. Unfortunately DocTurtle had to leave, and he frightened the flickers away before their relationship could be consummated, but I'm hoping they'll come back. My lawn's a good place for flicker sex, isn't it?

If you want to see the flicker mating dance, I found this cool site with a video loop. Never thought you'd be looking at bird porn, did you?

http://www.birdsamore.com/videos/nofl-dance.htm