Naughty Nurses

So there's a restaurant in Denver that's one of my favorites. It's called White Fence Farm (funny story: When DocTurtle and I were first going out I talked about the restaurant to him and he thought I was saying White Friends Farm, which caused him to question my political leanings a bit...), and it has the best fried chicken and beets and bean salad and corn fritters ever. "Why in the hell is Maughta telling me this?" you may ask yourself. Well, self, the answer is that every January White Fence Farm closes for a month for "repairs and renovations" which is a fancy way of saying that they need to get new menus printed up with a new and exciting jacked-up price.

In that same spirit, Judge a Book took a little hiatus for the month of February to repair and renovate. And jack-up the prices. Well, not really, but in the spirit of keeping this blog ad-free I've added a DONATE button to the sidebar. Help Maughta buy more books. What else are you gonna do with your tax return?

But Maughta, you say, why have you tempted us with the title Naughty Nurses (take THAT, google safe search!) and then talked about nothing for two paragraphs? You're absolutely right! Let the Naughty Nurses roll!

First up is a little something I like to call TOO MUCH SHIT ON THE COVER!

We've got nine elements:
* Silhouette
* Desire
* 15 Years (in a banner)
* Man of the Month (in trendy font)
* Author as Seen on Primetime TV (let's hope it was on Cops)
* Author's name (no-one really cares)
* Itty-bitty little title (no-one really cares about that, either)
* A blurb by NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR JAYNE ANN KRENTZ! (community service, perhaps?)
* And finally, to pull it all together, Skanky-Ralph-Macchio as NURSE.

Wow, Cover Artist, how did you manage to fit that all on the cover of a little tiny paperback? And make it so fantastically lame? Well done.

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The following is a community service message: DO NOT BE TEMPTED TO SELF PUBLISH YOUR BOOK. People will only make fun of you.

This book is $20 on Amazon. I hope Leeanne has a lot of friends willing to shell that out.

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I'd choose to not stand by the smokestacks, myself. And to not wear that stupid collar. But seriously, how does a girl decide between a Sugar Daddy and a studly blond Doctor? It can't be done, I tell ya!

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The Beach Boys can only dream about such things. Oh, Laurie, don't lose your Doctor to the waves! Why else get your RN degree unless it comes with an MRS degree to a pretty MD? I hope a shark eats their faces. (Thanks, Eric, although perhaps I should have used this for Phallic Phriday?)

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And finally, a challenge for Nurse Genie and her chiropractor. A nice close-up of the creepy hands on the back there. (Thanks, Jeanne Genie!)