1.22.2008

No Brainers

Some books just scream for us to judge them by their covers. Take the following cover, found by intrepid judger-in-the-field, Snow. As Snow points out, it's like Baen is doing this just to fuck with us. They're trying to see just how bad their covers could possibly be. Is Jim Baen's taste that bad? Apparently!


Y'know, as someone who's married to someone who's last name is slang for testicles, I feel for people with unfortunate names. But that's the nice thing about being an author. There's a handy little thing called a pseudonym that one can use if one wants to write, say, romance novels, and one's name is synonymous with sex! Y'know, if one didn't want to be, oh, I don't know, made fun of on a blog. Nina, you're the joy of fifteen year old boys, and bane of librarians, everywhere.

And what is going on with that woman, anyway? Is that some sort of chitinous shell? Are we morphing from a cockroach? Heh heh. COCKroach. BANGS. One BITE Stand. Heh heh heh.

And finally, a book that faithful reader Michael points out, "should be judged solely on typography:"

24 comments:

DocTurtle said...

I think that last book is a bootleg version of Mao's Little Blue Book.

effika said...

I saw the blue book on I Love Typography recently (near the end of this post)! I feel we've got some cross-over readers here.

Snow said...

Everybody duck!!!
Jim Baen shoots laser beams from his skull.

Eric B. said...

I need that typography book. And if all the pages inside are typeset like the cover, I'd need it even more.

deadlytoque said...

OK, I wasn't going to comment (excellent post, I just had nothing to say), but Blogger's randomly generated security word is, I kid you not, "schlongy". I have to post just to share that.

Maughta said...

"Schlongy," eh? This reminds me of my new game-to-play-at-work-when-boredom-overtakes-one, typing random adjectives into Google Image Search. Try it! Hours (well, maybe minutes) of entertainment. I'm not gonna do "schlongy," though. Even with a filter on I shudder to think of the pictures it'll bring up!

rgcxw said...

"Mrs. Maughta Bollocks"?

pangolin said...

I'm betting Nina Bangs is her pseudonym. *shudders*

Jim Baen, on the other hand, had nothing to do with the cover of the book, considering he died a year before it was published.

writtenwyrdd said...

I hate to disappoint, but Jim Baen's dead, so it's not his taste at fault there. Loved the typography cover. I have to hope it was deliberate humor, but probably wasn't.

Anonymous said...

*gigglesnort*

Best thing I've seen in a long, loooong time.

Anonymous said...

I must disagree about judging the third book solely on its typography. The spelling also deserves a mention.


--tnh

Bybee said...

The Jim Baen's book looks like someone got drunk on some wicked beverage and vomited up the cover, let it dry then took it in for publication.

yellojkt said...

That cover photo is definitely, Thoughtful High School Senior Pose #2.

Anonymous said...

> Maughta said...

> This reminds me of my new
> game-to-play-at-work
> when-boredom-overtakes-one,
> typing random adjectives into
> Google Image Search.

Long ago when the net was young and we were more or less innocent, my girlfriend went googling for information about a rapper I liked. Who wnet by the stage name of "Kinky".

Bad search term.

Snow said...

Nina Bangs The Best of Jim Baen

Sexy Sadie said...

Jim Baen looks like a wannabe George Lucas surrounded by wannabe Star Wars characters. I love the name Nina Bangs ;)

Anonymous said...

Maybe if you didn't read so much, you'd have time to post! Maughtamom

Anonymous said...

...I'm sorry. I keep on misreading 'Nina Bangs" as "Ninja Bangs' and can't help but think that it would make for an amazing title for a book.

Snow said...

Hey Maughta! We need more snark.

The.Effing.Librarian said...

part of me wishes that you stopped blogging because there's something totally awesomely cool about getting recognized (botd, lisnews), then quitting. it doesn't mean you're arrogant or ungrateful; it could just mean, "thanks, now I'll back out and let someone else have some fun." (or it could mean, "thanks, now go eff yourselves.")

B. Durbin said...

Pretty much every Baen book has a horrible cover, with very rare exceptions. It's actually a consideration for us when we purchase books; if the cover is horrible, we check the publisher, and if it's Baen we give it a better chance than if it were some other ppublisher.

xenobiologista said...

If I was the person who wrote the last one, I would have strangled the publisher. Hopefully the dust jacket looked better.

Anonymous said...

That last one is a library rebind, btw. It's from here:

http://www.typography.com/ask/showBlog.php?blogID=67

Anonymous said...

Maughta might not be daring enough, but I discovered that, now at least, if you type "schlongy" into Google Image Search you get a picture of the cover of "The Best Of Jim Baen's Universe."