5.11.2009

Nice socks.

I'm all for making it rich, but I'm just disinclined to actually go through all the hard work, sweat, tears, and financial instability that are required to actually get there. I do enjoy reading about others, though, who've made it big from humble beginnings. I like to dream how that might be me someday (despite the laziness noted above).

I don't want to turn into this guy, though. Maybe the cover artist is trying to demonstrate that you can make it big without any special "good looks" or that you can be weird and still make it big, or ... something. But this guy is a turnoff in all ways.

First, there's the goofy, over-eager expression on his face, like he can't wait to share his... secret... with you. Reminds me of the unpopular kid whose popular friend comes over to your table at lunch in high school to tell you that his buddy wants to go out with you. You look at the jock and get really hopeful, then glance over his shoulder to his "friend." Sad, sad letdown, while he sits there, face covered in zits and sweat, eager to hear whether he has a date to Homecoming. No offense meant. I was the female equivalent of that kid. :) But that's who he reminds me of.

I've never claimed to be a fashionista, and people who know me will quickly reassure you I'm not, but those socks are unbelievably gross. In fact, the whole ensemble makes me uncomfortable. If someone thinks it's attractive (or would be, on the right guy), please speak up. I need to learn. :) To me, it says "I was afraid I'd spill mustard on my tie, forcing me to learn how to do my own laundry because my mom won't launder my ties if there's food spilled on them, so I wore a mustard tie."

The chair. I guess that's a chair. I was in Egypt last year and saw the display of his grave goods from Tut's tomb at the Cairo museum. I think this chair was part of the collection. It looks neither comfortable nor stylish. Judging by the way he's sitting, I think the chair has given him hemorrhoids. In fact, the chair reminds me of those lion statues that wealthy people like to put in front of their homes or gates, that say: "Stay out. We're richer than you. If you don't leave, we'll sic our lions on you."

I guess I'll stay poor for the time being.

4 comments:

Alissa said...

I love that post is labeled "erotica"!

Anyway, I think you may be completely misunderstanding the title of this book. Obviously the name of the goofy nerdy guy on the cover is Rich, and this is actually just another cheap ripoff of Elmore Leonard's "Get Shorty."

Someone who is truly rich would never dress that way.

web said...

I can't help feeling that anyone who uses the term "ensemble" is just inherently claiming to be a fashionista. ;-)

Sarah said...

I like those lion statues. One of our neighbors had a pair out by their driveway, and every time we drove by them I'd wave hello to the lions. /random anecdote

FD said...

Sadly gotta disagree with Alissa's suggestion... Felix Dennis IS actually rich, but I can certainly understand why you'd think otherwise from the cover, which kinda matches the contents.
The paperback edition that I have (it was a freebie) is less distressing.